Her Dance Needs No Body

Her dance needs no body, no body at all.


She is both darkness and light.

I love when people send me music, and I especially love waking up to something like this on a Monday morning.  Knowing that someone thought of me when they heard this song, and it being my favs - Widespread Panic - makes me so darn happy and proud that my darker days AND shining moments have been influential and inspirational to others.  I love hearing about me inspiring others.  I love knowing that when music moves someone, they like to tell me about it because they know I've been moved and danced along to a musical journey throughout my battle with depression.  From cloud 9 to the flaming glimpses of hell I've gone through, music has been my constant therapy.  The Lord has been my bass player.  I have been the dancer.  And now I'm ready to be the singer.  I'm ready to take over and sing the song that the Lord wants me to and spread it to others. 

It is Spring and almost Summer...
and you know that means I'm in jam mode!
Go ahead and be prepared for music taking over this blog ;)

Peace Love and Music
Baily

the miscellany

One.

I'm in love with this song right now...

Two.

Yesterday I went to First Baptist Orlando with my parents and Michelle and heard a great message on "fasting" and how we can grow closer to God by giving up something that distracts us from spending time on our spiritual relationship.  I really enjoyed it and I think the pastor, Dr. David Uth, is an awesome speaker!

Later last night, I went to "Status" with Savannah and felt another tug at my heart that it is time to take my relationship with God to the next level. I know that I have a special heart for missions work, volunteering, and serving, and I am so ready to get out there and help people in some way!!! I am praying that God points me in the right direction to serve where HE wants me to serve, not just where I want me to serve.

I signed up for a couple of small-groups.

I think I am going to take a class on "Love" that goes off of C.S. Lewis' books.  I also signed up to get to know some of the people in the "Living Water Surf Ministry."

I visited with some of the guys and this really nice girl, Grace, and they invited me to be a part of their little group ministry - I told them I don't surf but I would love to take pictures and video with my Bloggie & Holga camera and hang out with people who enjoy the ocean!  Plus, grow closer to God??

Sign me up! ;)

Three.

I am thinking about saving up some money to buy a monogramming machine.  Does anyone have their own and do their own monogramming? 

There are shops EVERYWHERE in Alabama that monograms everything under the sun - for cheap! But not so much in Orlando.  The Southern girl's love for monogramming everything we own isn't as prevalent in this part of the country - although there are enough steel magnolias and sorority girls around here to get some business if I learn how to do it well enough!

If you have one, help me out & tell me what machine is best and all that good stuff! Thanks :)

Four.

 I was making some munchies to take over to my friend Susan's tonight when I got attacked by the kitchen sink.  Of course I was wearing one of my really classy white wife-beaters and I was pretty much white t-shirt contestin' it for a second there.  I had dogs sliding in my mess, but I got everybody dried off...

I got a good laugh out of it (and of course I was by myself so I'm sitting in the kitchen floor laughing hysterically and Millie is cocking her head like why is my Mommie so weird?!?)

I had to change after the hose-down by the sink...

I'm just trying to make some Jalapeno Poppers :)

Five.

I'm so ready for SUMMER to get here!

via 

"I've never dropped anyone I believed in."

-Marilyn Monroe

peace and love.

baily.

my sunday // giveaway reminder!!!

Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Clause.

Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams.

Because if you don't, who will?

-Jon Bon Jovi

{images via}

Peace and Love
bjj 

Don't forget my first GIVEAWAY ends tonight at midnight, so be sure to
enter! Click here!

I'm Moving On

"I've loved like I should
And lived like I shouldn't
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I'm moving on "

-rascal flatts

we heart music

One of my biggest beliefs is that two people can't possibly max out their love for one another without sharing a similar taste in music.  Trust me on this one, I have dated my fair share of boys and I have kissed a bunch of frogs.  At one point, I just said "screw it" and convinced myself that there was no Prince Charming for me, and if there was - he just wouldn't have my taste in music because there seemed to be no compatible music lover out there for me.  But - like most of the time, I was wrong!

One of these days I will get around to telling the entire story of my journey to finding such peace, love, and happiness with Clay, but for now I will just tell you a little bit about his good music taste - almost as good as his taste in women ;) Just kidding.

Since I had been hearing about Clay for so long from our mutual family-friends (his Godmother), I decided to "stalk" a little on FB to try to figure out who he was and learn a little more about him.  I mean, if it is on the profile then it really isn't me "stalking", right? ;) Haha

When I found his profile via a link from our shared friend's profile, I was immediately drawn to his quotes.  Always the quotes first, it's me!  I think quotes tell a lot about a person.  He had a Phish quote (one of our faaaaavorite bands).  That propelled me into thinking that he might possibly be just as cool as he was handsome in his pictures.  So, thanks to the Phish quote, I took it upon myself to introduce myself in a FB message and that's where it all began...

Then the texting. And phone calls. And the figuring out of when we were going to get to meet face-to-face.  A lot of our beginning texts and phone calls were about music, and obviously a lot about life in general.  Something huge was in the making... something wonderful... and I really can give a nod of appreciation to the music that we both love for making that come together for us.

And it has been fun, the music that sort of binds us.  Whether it be Phish, Zach Deputy, The Beatles, or Widespread Panic.  It's the sounds of reggae, string bands, and one-man bands that give us the background music we need for our many spontaneous dances we share in the living room, in a parking lot, or at a show we've traveled to go to together.  I'm very grateful for the music, and I'm very grateful for the love it found me. 

Sounds cheesy, but if you are over there rolling your eyes and unable to see the beauty I've found in these two things that came together for me, I'll be the first to say that you might want to listen to a few more jams and take to heart what they say every once in a while - because trust me, you never know what song is next on your playlist in life and if I hadn't been listening I would have missed the best song yet.

He's definitely my favorite song.  And it's a good one, almost perfectly composed.

So open up your hearts and ears to the music because usually, it's about a lot more than melody and lyric - it could be the door that opens up to the life you always wanted.

peace and love

baily

p.s. why am i so high on the music right now? because i have 7,478 items in my iTunes now.  i almost have as many songs as i did before the fire blew my computer up and plucked every torrent i owned (or pirated) away.  how??? that amazing music-loving bf i just told you about let me borrow his external hardrive and since we have the SAME love for peace & love music, well - that shoe fit too! because all of his music fit perfectly into my new beginnings iTunes files.  i am sooooooooo happy.
turn it up...

ive been called ruby tuesday

she would never say where she came from

yesterday don't matter if it's gone

while the sun is bright or in the darkest night

no one knows she comes and goes

goodbye ruby tuesday, who could hang a name on you?

when you change with every new day

still i'm gonna miss you

don't question why she needs to be so free

she'll  tell you it's the only way to be

she just can't be chained to a life where nothing's gained

and nothing's lost at such a cost

goodbye ruby tuesday, who could hang a name on you?

when you change with every new day

still i'm gonna miss you

"there's no time to lose"

i heard her say

catch your dreams before they slip away

dying all the time

lose your dreams you will lose your mind

ain't life unkind?

goodbye ruby tuesday, who could hang a name on you?

when you change with every new day

still i'm gonna miss you

the rolling stones

ruby tuesday

...don't you love how dramatic mick jagger is in this video?

you aren't american if you don't love the stones.

peace and love

baily

mi vida, en realidad (my life, actually)

I have not been a very active blogger lately and I am completely aware of it.  Sometimes things get busy or the stars align in other ways and we are too busy living and experiencing and we have to wait until things slow down in order to update the blog and all.  That's very much what has been going on with me.  Between schoolwork and entertaining a suprise guest, I just not have found a sweet little window of time to get some things off of my chest.

In time's past, when I say I have to unload the thoughts and burdens that are bothersome, it has come out in an unorganized mess that is usually an honest depiction of the process in which most my thinking occurs.  Anywho, I have a lot on my mind to say the least: some makes me happy, some makes me sad, and some have not been figured out entirely so I'm not exactly sure what sort of affect they will have on me.  

For starters, school is going well.  I have to admit that it is sometimes aggravating having to live in what is remnants of the fire and doing the things and sort of assignments I was doing before they were items to be added to my insurance claims check. But, Forrest Gump said it best... shit happens.

Speaking of FG, I watched that movie recently.  Actually, I watched all 3 of my favorite movies this week.  Almost Famous, Forrest Gump, and (500) Days of Summer.  Wow.  I couldn't tell you the last time I watched 3 DVDs in one week.  I know I have, because I have always been a movie girl and my sister was the television show gal.  But 3 in one week?  That happened NEVER when my world was the twilight zone.  Thank goodness for having that little luxury back in my life.  And where I thought Mr. Clay was going to be my music-man, he's turned out to be a pretty groovy movie watcher, too.  I have truly missed that for a while now, and it's good to have that back!

Something that has me flustered is that, to put it simply, Dancing With The Stars is absolutely awful this year. Please give me some lovelies to look at like Erin and Pamela if the dances are going to be just as sub-par to last season as the line-up is, but compared to Michael Bolton and The Situation, I would rather watch Jake Pavelka prancing around like a pansie again.  Or, maybe not.  I do like that Sarah Palin is in the stands and that Levi Johnston is banned from the audience.  And even though I was like the very last person of people my age to jump aboard the Jersey Shore boat, and despite the grossed-out near-nausea affect that The Situ & his boys have on me, I'm with my Sissy - I am in love with Snooki.  She cracks me up... and WHO cannot LoVe the fact that she called out our Pop-star Pres on the taxing of tanning beds.  Maybe it's that or maybe it's when she goes into an all-out fit fest she reminds me I'm not the only crazy bia-bia about there. Ha, jk. Maybe.

Oh yeah, speaking of fancy-prance Jake, did I ever let y'all know that I switched to "Team Vienna" after the spectacle he made of himself when he showed us what a d-word he was?  Yes, my ex-boyfriend in high school may or may not have had his transgressions with her... but we all can change... but none of us gals deserve to be treated like that.  "Undermine me?"  Sadly, the term was used with me.  Saddest part, after Jake had already used it and it be viewed by said person accusing me of the underminement. (Is that a word?? I do not know.)

And lastly, what do you do when you can't find the words to say to somebody?  There are two people that I don't know what to say.  One, I want to say goodbye to and leave the friendship that he left behind, but I want to do it with a little bit more grace than he did.  Maybe the reason there are no words is because he doesn't deserve another try and he doesn't deserve my friendship that fuels the need to say what I feel anyway.  So maybe I will just stay silent about that.  Still, I hope he never treats someone the way he has treated me.  But at the same exact time, I hope he can be a lighthouse to another life and safely guide lost ships to shore.  That's what he was for me.  He listened to me but made me hear the music of my own uniquness and that's what gave me the bubbly life of Baily back and what has kept me dancing throughout even the saddest of songs.  But I guess he doesn't neccessarily have to be amongst the ones dancing with me.  'Tis a shame, I would have been a good friend to him and he's chosen to not only have no desire for it, but has no desire to display any decency in listening to what I have to say or to know the new me.  The one that had to roll with the punches and adapt to some major friggin' changes in life.  Some HUGE ones.  Like, Ms. Gump said 'You have to put the past behind you in order to move on' and she's never been more right in her life.  Well, other than the other uber-brilliant lines she is quoted in that extra-uber-brilliant film.  But of course I've changed, better yet - I've improved, and I think that my Faith is what has me to continue on praying for him and the absolutely unneeded dramatic situation, and above all, a life full of happiness - even though most people think I'm batshit crazy for still caring about him.  I guess, once a Bobby McGee always a Bobby McGee.  But like most songs, interpret it as you will
The other, just sort of leaves me speechless for all the POSITIVE reasons.  Just the little things in life that are noticed and put into action without structured planning of so... the laughter that I would have NEVER known was missing until I realized I truly had it back... the ability to be oneself around someone unfamiliar yet more familiar and real than you can even describe, the affirmation that everything happens for a reason, and how pretty the glow of a candle can be after all, and the simplicity of knowing that fire can, in fact, be enjoyed when it's lighting the scene for reheated leftovers with someone special enough to WANT to know me, the REAL me.  And what really leaves me speechless... I've never been so honest about myself with someone in my entire life.  I surprise myself at the things I will tell him.  But they are safe - those secrets are. And any signs of jadedness on my heart are not from him, but he respects them.  I'll be able to put it in an understandable statement one day I reckon.  'Til then, I'll live my days with the appreciation for the people who not only want to build a friendship and relationship with me but they are willing to do it with a leap of faith.  While others, they turn their back on a true intent to be friends with not only him but the people he values with love, including the obviously highly thought of girlfriend of his.  I guess I was a part of a completely different friendship and I guess no matter what I do, or say, people will think of me the way THEY WANT TO think of me. 

And then others, think of me as - to put it simply - worth it.

Oh yeah, to get you caught up to speed with other ramblings: I have a renewed zest for learning Spanish again, I am DYING to get my hands on a personal project and turn it into something that makes a BIG DIFFERENCE for a charitable organization that I am PASSIONATE about, and I can't wait to see my family and get THE MILLIE GIRL back tomorrow.  .  . yes, be prepared for a Momma who has missed 'The Pig' and who will ALSO be getting her digi-cam back and you know what happened last time, don't you? When Mildred and I were reunited post-fire, and the digi-cam was replaced the first go-round (before the Target idiot broke the brand new thing), I ended up taking boo-koos of pictures. 

But it's not like she makes it hard to 'oOoH' and 'aAaAh' over, let's be for serious now...

peace and love

baily

and there's nothing wrong with the way that she moves;

or scarlet begonias or a touch of the blues

what a perf song chico