I've been having my high's and low's ever since my parents left me Monday afternoon. Sure, the fatigue and unknowing outcome of our situation resulted in some petty arguments between one another this past week at times, but I really am blessed to have such a wonderful connection with both my mother and my father. The sister that I have is not like most sisters, whatsoever. I really can't even express in words how much she has meant to me in all of my 22 years of life, but her actions this week speak louder than any words I could ever say. She jumped out of bed when my mom called to tell her the house was on fire and was immediately at the scene. Maybe the series of panic attacks I was facing that night as I watched the Tuscaloosa Fire Department swarm my house made me lose track of time, but I am still trying to figure out how she got out of bed, in the car, and to Tuscaloosa as fast as she did. She has temporarily adopted Millie while I get everything with my living situation settled and she has been my constant rock throughout this whole ordeal. I knew I was blessed before, but now I am overwhelmed with the fact.
My roommate and fellow fire-refugee, Jackie, is staying at the same place as I am. We both stay busy, trekking back and forth to class, and not to mention the two or three trips to Wal-Mart we both do each day. We've frequented Hooters for wings and Coors Lights, and yes - have become friends with the management. Classy. Aside from the usual stress of school (well for me it has been amplified due to the loss of textbooks and reference materials) Jackie and I have been able to find a little humor in our situation, which is probably a big help to the positive attitude I strive for each morning. Yesterday as I was on my way back from running an errand I received a text message from her saying, "Bring me some tweezers down to my room." I scanned my bathroom for a mental note of where I last saw my tweezers and texted her back that I would bring them to her. Then, I just laughed out loud as I was sitting at a traffic light. The mental note I had made of my bathroom was the bathroom at 1008 Oak Avenue. I don't even have tweezers, who am I kidding? I texted her back, "Nevermind, scratch that. Put it on the Wal-Mart list."
Our friends Whitney and Emily came to visit us last night. Emily brought her little Yorkshire terrier over (hidden in a tote bag) and it made me miss Millie. I hate not being with her. Ever since I brought her home from the Cracker Barrel in Rainbow City, Alabama on June 18th of last year, it has been hard to remember what life was like without her. Nothing is better than coming home from a long day of classes and seeing her get so excited to have me home. I went the longest without her when she stayed in Orlando with my parents after I got back from Pasadena in January. She stayed at Granna and Big Butch's house to recover from her "girl surgery" she had. It was a long month, having to come home and see her crate empty and not having my best bud around. Then it was even hard, but at least I had a book shelf full of familiar books, thousands of songs to perk me up on my iTunes, and a house full of friends and their dogs to keep my mind off of her absence. Now, it's the pictures of her that I uploaded to facebook before the fire that remind me of her presence and bountiful love. Oh yeah, and the wonderful sister/Millie's legal guardian of mine is willing to meet me halfway to see the little pig tomorrow. But, as cozy as my two double beds and window-unit AC are, I think I'm going to go the extra distance tomorrow after class so that I can relax in a more "homey" place for a little while and visit my favorite girls. And, maybe another contributing factor is Thirsty Thursday at the Birmingham Baron's baseball game.
Pray for me these next couple of weeks because my frustration with school is, like I said, a little bit more amplified now that most of my work, books, notes, etc. are all part of a fire scene. I have great teachers and the university, in general, has been good to us. The dean of students called Jackie on our behalf and asked if we needed clothes, student loans, supplies, or anything else. Maybe that is expected in a case like this, but I am fortunate for the good people that work together to make the Tuscaloosa and UA communities such a wonderful place to be a part of. It really is a great place, and even though I sometimes snarl or am, at times, quick to blame the school or this town for my bad attitude, I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for the experiences that have taken place here. I've come a long way in these 5 years and I love each person, place, and thing that have contributed to making me, me!
Before I get back to my studies, let me just point out a few of the perks of living like refuge! There is good to every bad.... that's one of the things I have discovered through all of this.
- free continental breakfast
- free coffee, 24/7
- sometimes the free coffee has a cookie jar beside it
- interstate noise = good sleep. frat-daddy's keg parties on Oak Ave = not good sleep.
- the ice machine here actually works
- friends w/ Hooters management = comp'ed meals and bar tabs
- no laundry, everything I wear is brand new
- no fighting over the AC/Heater with 5 very different temperatured girls
- housekeeping
- do not disturb door hangers
- workout facility
- fully loaded snack machine
- actual water pressure in the shower... it's amazing how much it affects your hair when you actually get all the shampoo and conditioner out of it
- Distance to Wal-Mart = 1 mile. Before? 4 miles.
Well, I could probably ramble forever... some things never change. But, seriously, I have many reasons to smile each day and I find ways to laugh so that I can keep this positive attitude in check. I'm a typical girl still... with hormones, and stresses, and episodes of self-pity but this new side of myself that I have seen show has been more womanly than childish. Figures, right? I'm four months shy of being 23 years old and a college graduate, so I ought to be more mature than I was.
I have to be honest though... the fact that before the fire my biggest worry was that I didn't have a clue where I was going to go after graduation in August. Now, I not only have an agenda for the near future in my life, but I don't even know where I'm going to live come next week when my stay at the hotel expires. All I know is, wherever I go next week or in four months from now.. I won't be packing much, I'll always remember it as the beginning of my new journey, and I'll go into it full-force because I won't let this fire stop me or slow me down in life.
Remember my blog post about "all life is is 3 or 4 days that shape the rest of it?" Well, April 13th is just going to be one of those days that will shape the rest of my life from here on out. I'm just glad I have so clearly seen the positives of one of my life's negatives, because I have a feeling my life will be way happier if I let it shape me in a positive way, don't you agree? So, here here!
Peace&Love
Bjj
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