He knows when I am lonely

I’m sure everyone, at one point or another, has felt the way that I do today.   Today I thought long and hard about the difference in feeling lonely and being alone.  You'd probably agree that these two things are very very different.  You see, I look at "lonely" as a feeling, not always a circumstance.  Because the most lonely I've ever been is not when I've been in isolation - sure, those are some pretty down and out days when I don't put myself around others and experience the joy of company and conversation.  But, what I mean is that the hardest type of loneliness is when you are surrounded by people but you don't feel like they understand you or you don't know how to portray what's in your mind and in your heart because you fear that they just won't get it.  And then there is the other kind of lonely when you have someone in your life that does "get you" but they remove themselves from you without much explanation.  Certainly not the explanation or compassion that you'd think a relationship filled with "I love you's" and "You're the best thing that ever happened to me" comments would deserve.  Today, I experienced both of these feelings of loneliness.  It's not my family's fault or my friends' fault that I feel lonely at times.  It is just part of us.  We are supposed to feel loneliness to a certain extent, in my opinion, so that we know the happiness that comes from others - like friends and family. 
My loneliness today didn't last for long, though.  Something really "God-sent" happened to me - which I know was a blessing for being so disciplined in my prayer and quiet times lately.  First of all, let me tell you something exremely weird - I haven't cried.  Someone I loved dearly and considered my best friend turned their back on what a wonderful relationship we had, and I haven't cried.  This is weird because I am a girl who FEELS.  I have super-emotions!!! I am a giver, a lover, a fighter, and I DO NOT believe in giving up on someone that you share so much with.  So for me not to cry, I am astounded (in a really good way) by my strength and dignity I have shown.  But, I still hurt on the inside.  I still wonder "why" and think "I never thought someone so gentle and that adored me SO much would just quit on me" but I somehow manage not to let it get me down or keep me down for long.  I turn to the one thing that will NEVER forsake me, never give up on me, and never ever ever let me down.  His promises are kept, no matter what and he never ignores me!!!

I am so glad I have a personal relationship with the Lord.  I'm free of worry and anxiety and sadness when I look into His Word and read the beautiful truth.  That there IS A PLAN FOR ME, there is a future for me, and there is a God who I can count on while I seek this plan and future. 

So, when I started feeling misunderstood, misinterpreted, and misjudged and when the feelings of lonely starting creeping in, I opened up my book case and grabbed a wonderful devotional, "Do You Know Who I Am?" by Angela Thomas.  I kid you not, I opened the book and turned right to this page...

It was an absolute reminder from the Lord that He knows my pains, He knows me weaknesses, He knows my heart's desires.  After I sat there and took a break from my 'project' I was working on and read this chapter that I just happened to open the book up to, I took in the awesome feeling of relief and felt so many worries just fade away.  I know that I will have lonely days.  I've experienced things in my life, like the fire, that few people will understand (and that's a good thing, I don't wish that upon anyone) and I know that life is an individualistic journey and we all are different - which can sometimes make for feelings of not fitting in, feeling left out, being rejected, being sad, and being misunderstood - but I also know that the Lord will not put any type of feelings, or any circumstance, or any tragedy in our lives without also giving us the strength and ability to handle it.  That's why I was meant to open the book up to page 111, Ch. 7 titled "Do You Know I Am Lonely? He is Here." 

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted

and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

By reading that and praying for God to help me with my loneliness, I was able to turn the pain and sadness of being lonely into a feeling of solitude. Solitude is a word intended to express the glory of being alone.  I enjoyed this quiet time... the silence, the stillness.  I was calmed... because I know He loves me, He cares for me, and He is always here. 



peace and love

baily

God will honor the woman who faces her

 loneliness and then decides to live with integrity.

Scriptured Inspiration

I've spent a lot of time in my Bible here lately.  It has always been my main source of hope, and it gives me uncomparable strength!

For two years I've battled some pretty tough fights with anxiety and depression, and it's been a struggle since my life changed with the fire in April.  But, I've also lived a very fruitful and blessed life when I was able to see past the gloom and smoke.  I have an unbreakable friendship with the Lord again and I can honestly say that I am refueled and rejuvenated every time I spend a few moments with God in the mornings.  My disciipline to have 'quiet time' everyday has definitely made a difference.  I am just a happier person these days... even when people try to break my spirit down.  I honestly think that because it is faithful to the Lord, and for the betterment of myself, no one can break this spirit of mine down. 

I continue to see the positives! 

Here are some verses that have kept my spirit up and my heart and soul full of faith!

God is great... He has provided for me and blessed me during a year full of downfalls. 

I continue on because of the promises I find in His word.

"HOPE WILL KEEP YOU HAPPY AND FULL OF PEACE."

-Romans 15:13

"IN MY DISTRESS I SCREAMED TO THE LORD FOR HIS HELP. AND HE HEARD ME FROM HEAVEN."

-Psalm 18:6

"Let me see your kindness to me in the morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for my prayer is sincere."

-Psalm 143:8

"BE HAPPY. GROW IN CHRIST.

LIVE IN HARMONY AND PEACE."

-II Corinthians 13:11

"Your spiritual strength comes as a gift from God."

-Hebrews 13:9

"GOD IS AT WORK WITHIN YOU."

-Philippians 2:13

 

all images via weheartit

peace and love

b a i l y

missing child&prayer request

 Over the weekend I was informed of a news story happening in my hometown in Florida. 

If you know anything about me, then you will know that what I am about to tell

you is something that is really bothering me and very heavy on my heart.

On Friday afternoon an 11-year old little girl by the name of Nadia Bloom, who is mildy autistic, went missing.  The search has continued since Friday.

According to the Winter Springs Police Department, this is the largest "missing

child" search that the city has taken on in over 20 years.

Nadia's bicycle was found just outside of the gated neighborhood in which she and her family live shortly after she was presumed missing.

How terrifying this must be for her parents, friends, and family.
 It would terrify any parent if this were to happen to their child. 
But how in need of comfort the Bloom family must be to know that

their child is mildly autistic,
and therefore may lack the knowledge or awareness of the dangers
 in this situation. The Bloom family is in need of prayer
 for comfort and support during this time.

The WSPD and the Seminole County Sherriff's Department are searching

a 3,000 acre area that is dense with swampy, marsh-like woods.

Please continue to pray for

the protection of Nadia,

comfort for her family,

and above all else,

her safe return.  

Psalm 22:24

FOR HE HAS NOT DESPISED OR DISDAINED THE SUFFERING OF THE AFFLICTED

ONE; HE HAS NOT HIDDEN HIS FACE FROM HIM

BUT HAS LISTENED TO HIS CRY FOR HELP

PeAcE & LoVe

and to God be the Glory

Bjj

Daily Scripture

Psalm 103:13

New International Version

As a father has compassion on his children, the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him.

My Dad and Jackson at the Dog Beach.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!!!!