spread the love wednesday

LOVE

 is like listening to music

from another room...you sing along

because you like the song, but then the

door closes and a train passes by. 

You can't hear it anymore, but

you keep on singing the song. 

Then, the door opens and you

can finally listen again.

peace and love
bjj

my favorite song today:  one day at a time by deana carter

I've got a friend that wears go-go boots to Sunday School

We used to sit and drink pink champagne on a tin roof

Ridin' it out in a Thunderbird,

Singin' out loud every single word of Jack & Diane

Tryin' to pretend there was no rules

Kissin' on boys and sneakin' in bars

Tryin' to get a glimpse of who we are

We weren't wild, but we weren't far

She said Thelma & Louise, you got nothin' on me

And you can tell ol' James Dean to get in line

Thanks to Elvis and Kurt Cobain, the world will never be the same

You gotta make history one day at a time...

She graduated in 1987

We were gonna make a break for it together

Headed out to Hollywood, where the stars are bright and the weather's good

But she changed her mind and went back to the 7-11

She went and married the football star

Had a few kids and works real hard

It ain't wild, but it ain't far

She said Thelma & Louise, you got nothin' on me

And you can tell ol' James Dean to get in line

Thanks to Elvis and Kurt Cobain, the world will never be the same

You gotta make history one day at time...

Hey Thelma & Louise, you got nothin' on me

And you can tell ol' James Dean to get in line

Thanks to Jesus and John Wayne, the world will never be the same

You gotta make history one day at a time...

Like John Lennon and Kennedy

I'm with them, yeah, 'cause I believe

You gotta make history one day a time.

speaking words of wisdom, in the music

I have been in a pretty moving relationship lately.  There isn't just one guy though; there are several of them! Ohh yaaa.  I spend my time with some of them when I'm studying and I've developed such a need for them when I hit the books.  Some of my time is spent with them right before I go to bed, I let them put me to sleep.  Others I get to spend time with on random chance, because I hear from them when I'm driving 'Buster' around town. 

My boyfriends lately have been, John, Kurt, Jack, Trey, Joshua, and Tom.

Then I've had a little girl action from Norah and Ingrid and Miranda.

I'm having a pretty loving and steady relationship with my music here recently. 
My tunes seem to keep me focused on school, and they sing me to sleep from my laptop's speakers, as well as entertain me on my daily commutes via the radioshow.
Ohhh, I miss my vinyl though. :(

John Lennon, Kurt Cobain, Jack Johnson, Trey Anastasio & Phish, Joshua Radin, and Tom Petty.

My lesbian lovers have been Norah Jones and Ingrid Michaelson and Miranda Lambert.

When I listen to them, they make it okay that I'm one of those girls that didn't quite "get it" the way the rest of the crowd seemed to.  They sing to me and make me feel like it's okay that I am the way I am, and that it's all good that I have a way of seeing things that everybody else is just afraid to dream of.
They make me feel like I should embrace that face that I'm to the girl with her belly-button showing, that wears Old Spice deodorant, and has an extremely raspy voice.

Everyone's life is a playlist of all sorts.  I've blogged about my unusual, unpredictable, and completely random genre of music interests.  My life's playlist is full of country, oldies, bluegrass, feminism, and free-spiritedness.  It's happy, sad, confusing, exhilarating, inspirational, honest, ridiculous and soul-filled; and the best part about it is that it all means something to me and makes me who I am. 

It's what everyone is talking about when they refer to dancing to the beat of a different drum.  I'm the different drummer.  I'm the painter who abstractly throws paint in a chaotic mess of color and darkness and I leave some sort of blankness in order to recognize the unfinished business I have in my life journey.  The songs I haven't yet mastered... the ones out West, or up North, or in the LoneStar state, or under the mother sun at home or near home in la Floridad. Who knows... and WHO CARES?

The first year of this blog it was all about WHERE AM I GOING? And, HOW AM I GOING TO GET THERE?  And I made myself sick of hearing myself say "WHO AM I? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NEXT? WHO SHOULD I BE WITH? SHOULD I LOVE HIM OR LOVE HIM?"

My music has spoken and it's time to do this: let it be.

Yep, the Beatles have spoken and though shall listen to something as BIG as them, right!?

So along with - LET IT BE - I also learned that all we need is love and that when I think of yesterday and while my guitar gently weeps, I must remember that all things must pass.  They've also taught me to don't ever change and that it feels good to be free as a bird.  I know that I'll be on my way if I'll follow the sun. I've got a feeling that this won't be the last tough time I will have in my life, so that's all right, I've had a revolution with myself and I'm ready to go across the universe to find a ticket to ride the long and winding road.  I have the inner light that I need to the end.  There are things I wish I could tell others, but maybe I can leave what the Beatles have taught me with this....
to know her is to love her
tomorrow never knows
i should have known better
and I get by with a little help from my friends.

I'll tell you about some of my other boyfriends and what they sing to me tomorrow.

peace and love
bai

she's a magical, sparkling tease

she's a rainbow choking the breeze

yo, she's busting out onto the scene

with nightmare bogus poetry

she's melted avocado on the shelf

she's the science of herself

she's spazzing out on a cosmic level

and she's meditating with the devil

she's cooking salad for breakfast

she's got tofu the size of Texas

she's a witness to her own glory

she's a never-ending story

she's a frolicking depression

she's self-inflicted obsession

she's got a thousand lonely husbands

she's playing footsie in another dimension

she's a goddess milking her time

for all that it's worth

-beck

song on repeat - my girl miranda

"More Like Her"

She's beautiful, in her simple little way.

She don't have too much to say when she gets mad.

She understands, she don't let go of anything.

Even when the pain gets really bad.

I guess I should've been more like that.

You had it all, for a pretty little while.

And somehow you made me smile when I was sad.

You took a chance on a bruised and beaten heart,

And then you realized you wanted what you had.

I guess I should've been more like that.

I should have held on to my pride.

I should have never let you lie.

I guess you got what you deserve.

I guess I should've been more like her.

Forgiving you, she's stronger than I am.

you don't look much like a man from where I'm at,

It's plain to see desperation shown its truth

you love her and she loves you with all she has

I guess I should've been more like that.

I should have held on to my pride.

I should have never let you lie.

I guess you got what you deserve.

I guess I should've been more like her.

She's beautiful, in her simple little way.

-Miranda Lambert

I freaking love her. She's so awesome.

Blake Shelton ADORES her and I want a boy that looks at me that way!

One of the most special people in my life is named Adam Sanford. He took me to

what was supposed to be a weekend of a Coldplay concert and a Kenny Chesney concert (Miranda Lambert/Lady Antebellum) on two different nights in Tampa.

It was this time last year, actually. SO FUN!

Except Chris Martin, Coldplay's lead singer, got the flu and the show couldn't go on.

On the night of the Kenny show (at the Ford Ampitheater in Tampa) it was the biggest rainstorm I've ever seen in my entire life.  But, just in time for MIRANDA, he had a Coors Light in my hand and I was boot scootin' in my Daisy Dukes to what I believe to be

one of the coolest country music girls ever.

If you know me, no matter what kind of feminist activist I can be at times, I'm just not that big on the girls - Shania, Faith, Carrie - none of them do it for the way she does.

I think she's just REAL.

She was hammered, in her Daisy Dukes, and a Texas Football t-shirt when she got on stage to open up for Kenny Chesney.

She said, "Y'all aren't the only ones gettin' drunk while waiting out this storm!"

Then she busted out White Liar which has become my friends' fav to blast in the car with me

Rock on, girl.

"Hey white liar, the truth comes out a little a time. And it spreads just like a fire, slips off of your tongue like turpentine. And I don't know why, white liar."

PEACE and LOVE

BAILY

"Here's a bombshell just for you, turns out I've been lying too."

And since I have blog friends from everywhere,

and because I am a proud

S O U T H E R N   G I R L 

I am going to put my favorite <country> song at the moment's lyrics

 on a new post above this one! 

 (and since my bff from home is from New York but

takes to Southern things because of ME and

 I love her and I know she would appreciate this song's lyrics...

so check my next post, Mandy!)

dear mom and dad,

you know how you like to joke that

i'm one part hippie, one part country-girl?

i'd like these for my bday please.

23 in 23 days!

i write it out, van morrison sings to me, and everything is good again

So guess what has been happening to me lately? These 'phriends' that I've been talking about, you know the one's that are a cross between what is a 'phony' and what is a true 'friend.' Well, I have all of a suddenly started to hear from some of them. Like they were all in "still mode" for so long and then time went by and they reset themselves and boom! they were all hitting me up at once. I will call them my 'phriends' in this one particular way in this blogpost but do not get them confused with my "Phriends," in the sense that this type of Phriend are the friends of mine who also share a love for the jamband PHISH. Hahaha. Woah. Come to think of it - one of them is a rather intense 'Phriend' (in the jamband loving way), and then there is another PHISH-loving 'Phriend' that I heard from out of the blue recently (he was never a phony though, however we did lose touch in the hustle and bustle of these past couple of months). I phriggin' love him though. (HELLO over there on the Left Coast, moonchild!) - He calls me Sunbeam!! Ya dig?!
Anyways, so in the past two weeks I have heard from BB, KG, WP, PN, CJ, and CM. Umm.... weird. You might not think it's weird, but why all of a sudden? I'm sorry but I do not feel like I am in the wrong for being upset about some people's true colors that showed themselves so clearly to me in the days surrounding the fire. I know I sound like a broken record, but that fire was life-changing. I've never felt reality so intensely and had to desperately cling to what little bit of hope is left at the end of the rope. That's when I so badly needed some of these people's friendship, the unconditional love they promised, the loyalty, the support, the encouragement, a kick in the ass, something.  Literally, I HATE being ignored. I'd rather someone cuss me and spit in my face than just blatantly ignore me. But that's what I felt. Ignored; neglected; fooled; upset; doubtful; inconfidant; not groovy. 
Why, if you're going to betray me and the friendship we have, MUST you do it when I lose everything I have? Could you not hold out a couple more weeks...? Could you not just wait until I pitched a stressful hissy-fittin' temper tantrum and used it as an out, or an excuse? Just so I can have some friggin' peace of mind at night...
I replay everything... what exactly did I so so bad to these people, that you was significant enough for them to not want to be friends with me, yet isignificant enough that I can't remember what I did tha. Hmm.. it drives me nuts.
Trust me, I'll be the first to admit that I am VERY AWARE at why I'm 0 for 34903840!!! (who's still even keeping count, are you serious? Surely you've given up by now) I know very well that I'm the most imperfect girlfriend, and that I'm capable of being a craaaazy bitch, but only 3 of those initials up there are ex's and 1 of them is a dear friend & the other 2 no longer have any affect on my life whatsoever, so I'm really talking about those "best buds" that are like distant strangers to me now.
I must not be so down and out, and allow me to interrupt I, and let me be share an out-of-the-blue-positive by saying that my surprise reconnection with moonchildren like TP; and finally getting to hang with girlbuds like Foy & Libby; and making new slash unexpected friends like Fell & Denby, are all examples of life's little giveaways!
Like wildflower, another life giveaway. They just pop up on the side of the road, in the interstate median, and through a crack in the sidewalk and just make things... better! Well, supercool people that make time for me and want to catch-up and whatnot, well, they're my life's Gerber Daisies. They make putting up with the other b.s. worth it.

These other ones, they make me question things, they dig deep at my willingness to forgive. They send a half-hearted text message and it's like I'm sucked into this matrix of self-conflict. They make me question my confidence, my ability to love and be loved, my social being, my friendship qualities, my personality traits, my social acceptance, my self-awareness, everything.
I want to block so many numbers, just so I don't even have to receive them and go through the whole process of the "huh?" "wtf?" "come again?" and whatnots but I don't really know what Verizon would think when I turn in a roster of names and numbers of peole who I don't even want to waste time pressing "Ignore" on. No, I'm being melo-dramatic. But, I do want to know why all of a sudden it all happens at once. Is it trying to show me something? Because I clearly see how apathetic I am about those people/situations/circumstances nowadays. Bigger fish to fry.
But seriously, these bigger fish like school, fire, refugee living, and empty piggy-bank, are getting old... are they almost fried just right yet? Because... seriously... my brain is. 
Hey Anchors From My Past, will you people PLEASE STOP TEXTING ME AND PRETENDING LIKE YOU CARE. You didn't care when I needed you. So I don't care now! Go away... you're cinging my fried brain. And Lord knows everything else in my life was cinged. Oh yeah, did you know that I lost EVERYTHING I freaking own in a fire while you were away?!

I know that we are taught to FORGIVE. But, there's no expiration on forgiveness if it's truthful. I will pray that God give me a forgiving heart to some of these people, but sometimes all that "trespassing" we're supposed to forgive, it hurts and it damn near kills you. But you know what else it does? It makes you so incredibly greatful for the people that DID stick by you. The ones that stuck it out, sucked it up, stayed honest, stayed true, and stayed real. I dig you guys! And I love you with a love that's bigger than the Beatles. 
I just wish my CrackBerry could filter out the fake apologies, the meaningless promises, and empty words that come in to my Inbox. The iPhone doesn't have that app either, I already checked. I guess I'm going to have to grin and bear it and do what I know I need to do....

.....PUT IT IN GODS HANDS!

peaceofmind&lotsoflove

baily

van morrison is my cure-all. therefore, i'm listening to him.

he appreciates that that i'm a brown eyed girl.

he reminds us that mama warned us there'd be days like this.

he just wants to  rock your gypsy soul.

he's what summer nights are all about, dancin' in the moonlight.

and you know what? he makes me realize that i'm only concerned about the people who look at me and think... ain't no sunshine when she's gone.

and most importantly, he makes me realize that these are the days.

how's that for a playlist?

blue bonnets

Hair blowin' in the wind

Wonder what you pretend you are

When you run

Bandana on your head

Your face is turning red

You throw it down to the ground

When you are done

I'll think of you

When the blue bonnets bloom

When the blue bonnets bloom

I'll think of you

You always seem to make me laugh

When you ask, "what is that?"

A million times

And you know

Little things that you do

They are the things that get me through

When I'm up to my hips in snow

Another night, I'm working hard

Another night, another bar

A million miles outta touch

Say your prayers, say my name

Keep it fresh on your brain

And don't forget I love you this much.

-Cross Candadian Ragweed-

this has always been one of my favorite songs. before the fire, i had it on vinyl. it's funny how a song can take you back to a certain place in time. the acoustic is eerily nostalgic for me, and the lyrics have more substance than just words to a melody. to me, it makes me think of a certain time, a certain person, and a certain personal conflict that i was going through. i was faced with two options during this certain time. there were two people that each had pieces of my heart, a little place in the history of my life, and opportunities for second chances. i went to oz record store to clear my head, and came home with a cross canadian ragweed vinyl. i listened to this song. i just dropped the needle on some random track and told myself to listen to the words and see if it helps me in some way. yes, i'm weird like that and when my indecisive nature rules over any other means of making the right decisions, i turn to my music. painters paint, singers sing, and music lovers listen to the music they love. on this day, i bought the vinyl on happen-chance, and let it speak to me. i had never heard this song before that day, but i played it a lot. come to think of it, i think it was the record that was still on the turntable when the fire destroyed it. when i heard the words to this song i knew exactly what my life was doing and what my heart was feeling. i pictured the one person that would actually say these things about me. the person that likes the little things about me. and probably the only person that digs it when i wear my bandanas in my hair. i smiled when i heard the words, and to this day the song just soothes me. maybe we all should stop to listen a little closer to what our songs are actually saying to us. it helped me get my mind straight and it helped me follow my heart instead of making another decision i would eventually someday regret, big time. i should have known, someone once told me that

music is what feelings sound like.

peaceandloveeverlasting

baily

Wildflower's Weekly Recap

<on the reg>

in one word or phrase: strengthened

dreaming of you: insurance claim check

song on repeat: you got the love by joss stone

gotta write it down: lyrics to the song above.

sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough

and things go wrong no matter what i do

now and then it feels like life is just too much

you've got the love i need to see me through

when food is gone you are my daily meal

when friends are gone i know my savior's love is real

your love is real

every once in a while i say Lord i can't go on

every once in a while i get to feeling blue

every once in a while it seems like i am all alone

but you got the love i need to see me through

lesson learned: (1) i like costco more than sam's club; target more than wal-mart

(2) a girl is lucky if a man loves her even after all the mistakes, bad judgements, and poor decisions she made. when he loves even her flaws and doesn't turn away from her when the going gets tough. usually, there's only 2 men in a girl's life that this regards: jesus and our daddy. but for some, for girls like me, we have that kind of love from someone else, and we ought to never take it for granted.

picture to frame:

highlight of the week: getting my mattress/having my own bed

weekend to-do list: (1) quality time with chace

(2) paint my desk magenta

(3) book my flight to orlando for justin core's wedding

(4) first baptist trussville w/ash.ty.chace.

(5) oak mountain state park w/millie.tripp.chace.

(6) mourn the loss of casey (mad crush) on american idol but root for my girl (janis reincarnate) crystal

enjoying the ride, and not worrying about the destination

peaceandlove

bailyjj

the one about karaoke bars

Last night, Chace and I met up with some of our friends at a karaoke bar in Birmingham. We picked up our friend Katherine and then met a bigger group at this place called "Starz." I had never been there before, but come to think of it - I've never been to a place that is solely karaoke. In Tuscaloosa, where it's true college town fashion, the pubs and bars will have a designated night that is solely karaoke... but there's no place like "Starz."

Call me a party-pooper if you must, but I don't really dig karaoke. I like to watch my friends make asses of themselves and I like the nostalgia that you get when someone sings something you haven't heard in years. You know what I'm talking about, you crazy karaoke fan you. The song that comes from way out in left field. Case in point: Goodbye Earl, by the Dixie Chicks. And yes... three tipsy girls got on stage and sang it together. Remember, when it comes to karaoke "cliche" is ALWAYS a neccessity and MUST be in full friggin' force!! Seriously, it's not so much that I don't dig karaoke, because I had a pretty fun time last night - it's just that I don't like getting up there and singing. I mean, I'd hate to put everyone else in the bar to shame with my incredible singing talent. I kid, I kid. I feel like my crazy life is entertaining enough. I don't have to have a microphone and make a spectacle of myself.

If I DO get all crazy-like and decide to entertain the crowd then my performance is strickly limited to Janis Joplin's Bobby McGee. One, I'm raspy like she is. Two, you can't really butcher it. And three, it's my favorite song ever. But I didn't do it last night. I wasn't feeling very Janis-like. Plus, I had heels on. If you know me, you know I'm not a dainty little girly girl. Every guy I've ever dated, and all of my friends, tease me about my noninterest in wearing dresses, my worn out gladiator sandles and my never-been-worn high heels. I'm pretty sure it's like Christmas Day to Chace if I actually spent time on myself getting ready. I usually give it a "I don't give a beep"and call it a night. So, putting on a show at "Starz" last night was not an option. Come on, though, for real - high heels or a 2 minute song? You can't have everything!

Kat sang "Lollipop" by Lil Wayne. Hilarious is an understatement. Oh but don't you worry... Chace is one of those creepy "iPhone" people and video recorded her entire rendition. If he knew how to work the damn thing I'd say I would post it but I am convinced that half the people that own those high tech phones don't know what in the world to do with them. (Note: I'm a BlackBerry addict therefore I am an iPhone hater by default.) Back to Kat, the girl had the entire place standing up and groovin' to the 2008 hip hop hit. It was impressive, to say the least.

What is your "go to" karaoke song?

If you were singing karaoke right now, what song would fit your mood?

Mine's 'Bobby McGee' by Janis Joplin.

My mood right now kinda calls for 'I Am The Walrus' by the Beatles.

I have been VERY much Beatles here lately. They're kinda a big deal.

Peace&Love

Bai