Writer's Block = Random

Random Stuff:what you blog about when you've got writer's block

I am so glad that Grayson isn't a Tiger, Gator, or Volunteer...

He is a little Crimson Tide fan!!!

Seriously, there aren't many things cuter than a little Bama baby!

Okay okay, I have to add this or else my brother-in-law will ground me from hanging out with GCL.
 Baby Grayson DOES have a little bit of Gamecock in him, too.  But, I think he will soon figure out that being a South Carolina fan is really only cool during college baseball's College World Series.
  I'm sure he will stick to Bama during football season, though.  His granddaddy Butch (my Dad) will recruit him to join the Tar Heel faithful with us when it is basketball season. My entire family is nuts over college sports and we do not expect Grayson to be anything different. 

He and his "Aunt Sissy" have been working on his soon-to-be first words....
Rolllll Tide Rolllll!

I think someone may have said "War Eagle" right before this picture was taken.

That's the "go to hell" look that I shoot at Auburn fans, too!

While I'm on the subject of the Tide, let me just tell you how stoked I am about the game this weekend.

It is Bama vs. Florida, and it is the rivalry that I look forward to the most - well, besides Auburn.  We don't play Florida every year because the Gators are in the SEC East and the Tide is in the West, but we have met plenty of times in the past few years between regular season games and the back-to-back SEC Championship games that we split victories in. The rivalry ante was upped on those two special occassions because both years the teams were ranked #1 and #2 in the BCS Poll.  Each won a national championship in the past couple of years and both teams recruit like a boss!  This year, the Gator Nation is not
quite up to their standards. With their new coach and a young-but-talented team, the Gators are the underdogs this weekend.  Bama, on the other hand, is damn near perfect and one of the most fun teams to watch this year.  I am saying that because I am a diehard Bama girl, but I am also saying that because I think a few savvy sports fans would agree with me on that. No matter who is on the field - offense, defense, or special teams - the Crimson Tide puts on a show and Nick Saban makes opposing coaches look stupid.

Anyway, I am very ready to see the show in 'the Swamp' this weekend.  I love beating my home state's largest university and my best friends' alma mater.  The rivalry is super personal for me since I live in Florida, have many Gator friends, and I am in love with a guy who bleeds that tacky orange and blue.  Being as that is his only flaw, I can live with it ;)

It's going to be a good, fun game... even if it is in 'the Swamp' and not at Bryant-Denny. 

We hosted them at home last year and put a good old fashioned ass-whooping on them and sent them back to Gainesville.  I know that in the SEC any given team can win on any given day... so I have to watch my mouth.  I just keep praying for patience and that God calm my nerves down when those fans start doing that stupid ole' "Gator chomp." Ugh... but anyways..

Cheers to the Tide!

Fall is my favorite time of year because it means:

...that it is football season & time for tailgating!

...the weather is cooler (but not miserabe winter weather!)

...a new television season begins

...Pumpkin Spice Lattes at Starbucks

... cooking and eating lots of casseroles, soups, and pies

....that the major league baseball season is almost over. (Whew!)

... that I rock boots & scarves with anything and everything.

...that the holidays are right around the corner!!!

I just wish that Florida had more of a Fall.  Summer seems to stick around until Christmas but some years we will have us a little bit of a cold spell winter.  By that I mean, bring a sweater out on your Valentine's Day date because you might need it.  I am cold-natured and have chill bumps all over in the middle of the summer, so I'm ok with just the mild coldness!  I just wish the leaves changed colors... but when the rest of the nation is cold, grey, and bare come Winter, I do have to say it feels good to have such a green and florished environment still.  Florida is just one of a kind - and you either love it or hate it.  I am enjoying it... I have not lived in FL during the Fall since 2004.  I forgot how brutally hot it still is at the end of September!!!

I took this pic from my front yard the other day...

Then later that evening, I took another one....

I thought it was fascinating how blue the daytime sky was, but it was even more exhilerating seeing the same sky be painted pink and look so pretty and sweet. 

I guess Florida is just colorful in her own way.  I can deal with the no leaves changing colors as long as I have a watercolored sunset like that!  (I wish I could have gotten a bigger shot of the sky... it went on and on and on...)

I made a really yummy casserole for my parents and I on Sunday night. 

Once I get it finished I will post the recipe.  Here's a sneak peek:

Chicken & Broccoli & Rice casserole.  It was delish - if I do say so myself!  

This post is so random and I'm over it.  Haha.  I will blog again later today when I actually have something to write about.  I have been itching to really sit down and do some creative writing here lately... I miss my short stories and personal essays that I used to post on here.  I need to make more time for my writing and I need to revitalize my inspirational and motivational techniques to get the writer's vibes vibing!

What inspires you?

I love quotes!

Like this one, for instance...

and this one...

I'll just leave you with that.

A random mess of tid-bits for your Tuesday reading.

Someone send me a prompt, a link-up, or anything to get my inspiration going.

Pretty, pretty please!?!

PEACE & LOVE

bjj

sunday love

I hope that everyone is having a fabulous Sunday full of peace and love - and if you are very fortunate, then I hope you are embracing the joy of being around the ones you love and/or fellowshipping with fellow believers and warm-hearted people.  That was the kind of Sunday that I had - family love, "How Great Thou Art," and a sermon that touched the soul - simply titled, HE IS HOLY. 

I really enjoy going to church with my Mom and Dad again - I was an inconsistent church-goer at school (which I wish wasn't the case but with the college life it semed pretty typical).  I was raised in a Southern Baptist church where I became a believer and baptized in 1999.  Before that, though, we had always called that place home.  When I left for college at the University of Alabama - after my 2005 high school graduation, that church had been my home for many years and was a safe harbor and a caring & safe place.  I know that the church still means well and I know that God works tremendously through the hands of its congregation, every single day, but over the past few years we fell distant to the things that big churches become.  Sometimes churches can be big and do amazing things, but sometimes churches can be on their way to being huge and hurt people along the way.  Everything is circumstantial, I believe, and I firmly believe that the reasons that my family and I are no longer members of the only church we have ever called "home" is circumstantial and individualistic.  Sure, it fell in a time when there was a gap and slipping church enrollment, but I know we wanted more than anything to do what God led us to do, and he led us searching for a new church home.  I have been visiting several different churches at night, but my morning service and worship time I want to be with my parents - it's one of the greatest things about being at home is going to church in my Sunday best with Momma and Daddy.  I pray every night that we find our current place of worhsip a nice fit and can soon call it home for good.
So many things have happened to me in the past year.  A lot of changes.  I lost life as I knew it - church, school, belongings to the fire, friends, relationships I put my heart and soul in, and A LOT OF PRIDE.  If I could only explain to you some of the ridiculous and life-challenging MESSES I got myself into then you'd be reading a damn near novel.  I won't go into the deets, but let's just put it in the words of one my main men: Bob Dylan.  "Chaos is a friend of mne."

Even though so many things have happened to me, I have realized a lot - especially during my few week blogging-hiatus where I just thunk and thunk and thunk ;)

For one, I consider myself majorly lucky to even be aware that all of this "stuff" has happened to me for a reason and that it wasn't just for shits and giggles and a bunch of April's Fool jokes being played on me - although April and I do have more of a hate/hate relationship with one another and she likes to screw me one good time during this month.  But, whatever she showers me with - I have learned to grow it in to a May flower.  Like for instance, a good friend of mine passed away on April 1 - about the same time I was hanging out with my good friend here in Orlando and in tears to him trying to explain my anxiety and constant worry during the month of April.  "Oh but bad things always happen in April for me - it's a curse," I'd say.  Even I knew that I was being slightly melodramatic (but remember, I cannot help who I am, ha) but wouldn't you know - I got a call that a buddy from Tuscaloosa who had just moved to Charleston to clean up his act, get his life together, move on from past mistakes and bad habits, was dead.  He relapsed.  And just like that, April took another friend from me. 

But I know that things, ALL THINGS, happen for a reason.  It's a hokie dokie saying that we brush off and say when the timing calls for it but it seriously all happens for a reason.  You stub your toe? Meant to happen.  Maybe it kept you from going on a jog that would have ended violently or traumatically?  You miss the school bus and when your Mom drops you off in the car-riders lane you learn that your bus was in a trauamtic accident.  Every little thing, if you think about it, happens for a solid reason.

I just think it's almost insane that God throws these details into our lives.  Like me not being in that fire, Millie not being locked up in that crate.  I crossed two lanes of traffic and hit a power pole, but no one was in the opposite lane - for a reason.  He crushed and shattered ever piece of my heart and it's been hell putting it back together - for a reason.  I have a really dark spot in my life's timeline, and I have really groovy colored spots on it too - because the darker spots make the colored ones even better.  How can you not love a God that spends so much time giving you a life of adventure, a riddle or rhyme or two to help you figure out the reasons He does things so mysteriously, but always in the end doing it for the sake of your good, His good, and His Gospel's good?  How can you not love that God?

I am just overcome with joy today because - I have to be honest, some Sunday's I get sad.  Some Sunday's I miss our old church.  I miss the friends, the people I grew up praying for and them praying for me, I miss my parent's little group of friends and how they always knew what was going on with me (and I hoped at least that they had compassion and understanding for me during my struggles) and I miss the church family belonging.  I really want to join First Baptist Orlando, but it is so overwhelming - the size of that church, sometimes.  I just have a calling - and I know it's a calling from God telling me that there IS a reason that my life has played out the way that it has - and I want to go serve in the mission field for a short time.  And First Baptist Orlando is the perfect place for service.  I would keep you here until Tuesday if I went into all the neat, Godly projects that is going on in that church.  I just love it.  And if you know me... then you can remember that "my word" is PASSION and I love when (so many) people tell me that I am a passionate person - I just loooove it because that is success to me, to be passionate - but anyways, the motto or mantra or whatever you wish to call it for the First Baptist Church of Orlando is PASSION FOR GOD.  It just screams.... "BAILY JORDAN JONES, THIS IS SO YOUR PLACE TO COME FIND YOUR PURPOSE!" 

I want to go on a short-term mission project, not sign my life away just yet.  But I have a zest for travel, a love for God, a yearning to learn more about the world, and a testimony and that I am SO not afraid to share.  I love the microphone!  I don't want to travel and see the world from one Hilton the next Marriott - I want to really see the world and give them something, I want to go over there and do it for Him, not me. I just have no desire, whatsoever, to go overseas to gawk and pretend to awe over arts and architecture that - no offense - I don't really give a damn for.  And I really don't want to go to London or Paris or anywhere and look at castles of Queens and Kings I know nothing about.  I want to go over to that part of the country and share the Gospel, serve under-developed children, bring creativity and the joy of arts and culture to their lives the way they bring it to our lives - I don't want to go play hoity toity Parisian... I want to get my hands dirty and prove that I may not have been ready to be a professional business-woman college graduate just yet, but I AM ready to serve, to share what I've learned throughout my own personal tragedies, and just love and dance and smiles and sing and give someone a hug. 

I know a lot of you don't know what it is like to be depressed - but I know that everyone suffers.  Whether you are like me and have an actual biological, chemical imbalance or not... there are times when you are sad, when you've lost, when you've mourned, when you've grieved - and in those times, you rememner the ones that were there for you to help you, serve you, be with you, understand you, pray for you, and give you hope.  I can do that.  I can do those things so well - God has shown me in multitudes of ways.  I've been moved, I am being changed - and this time: I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE.  I am letting GOD control my path, because I want the destiny HE has planned for me - full of joy, peace, and love - the things I believe in. 

I'm not going to listen to anything but my heart and what the Lord convicts, sways, moves, and touches.  I know He dwells within me and will show me the right way.  I'm tired of my way - because it is soooo the wrong way.

Oh, and another reason I have no desire to go look at castles of Kings and Queens of another country that are rude to us, is that I'm a proud and loud SOUTHERN BELL and I ain't going to no castle being as I have never graced the gates of GRACELAND where my King lived and died.  Call me a redneck, but I've got a better name for you I bet ;)

Peace and Love
Baily

Pray for me that in this next year I find my true direction.  I am in no hurry, I am on God's time! Love you all!

"When I had nothing to lose, I had everything. When I stopped being who I am, I found myself."
-Paulo Coelho



God wins!

"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells."

-Dr. Seuss-

Today started out much better than yesterday did.  And I know why!  I should never underestimate the power of PRAYER.

I spent a lot of time yesterday in solitude.  I got to think about all of the things that were bugging me and I was able to release a lot of those burdens by getting it all off of my chest and talking/blogging about it.  But most of my peace of mind that I am experiencing today comes from the time I spent in prayer and conversation with God.  I applied the things that I have been learning about Seeking God (the last 6 weeks at FBC Orlando have been about this) and spent a lot of time in reverant prayer - giving thanks, asking for wisdom, and listening for his answers. 

I just feel SO MUCH better when I know He is in control - why is it that I stumble and forget this sometimes?  I just don't understand why I try to control my life when I know life is so much lovelier when I let HIM control my life.  This is part of my diligent prayer - wisdom to remember that He brings PEACE and I... well I bring CHAOS!

So in regard to who has better control over my life - me or God...

God wins!!!

Duh.

Anyways...

I have a really exciting weekend planned and I just can't wait for it to get here.  I'm going out on the town in Winter Park to Wine Room tomorrow night, to the Orlando Chili Cook-Off (that benefits the Special Olympics) on Saturday, and to All Fired Up to paint!!!

I am in the mood to do something crafty today...

Any ideas on what to do?!?

peace and love

bai

images via

weheartit.com

weekly recap

in one word or phrase:
all that i need now is in my soul

i'm dreaming of you:
no more aches & pains, holding baby Piper, and a love that is equally yoked in faith (my nana's best friend reminded me that I deserve that most!)

songs on repeat:
shinedown's tribute to lynyrd skynyrd's SIMPLE MAN
click here - you HAVE to see it....

and ben harper's "diamonds on the inside" which is pretty personally moving to me...  


gotta write it down:

"if i didn't define myself for myself, i would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive." -audra lorde
i couldn't agree more with this right now. 

"everybody has difficult years, but a lot of times the difficult years end up being the greatest years of your entire life." -brittany murphy
rip. i seriously miss her. she was an actress i always felt connected to, personality-wise.  and for the record, i think of that as a good thing (in case there are any murph-haters out there!)

lesson learned:
God has someone AMAZING for me, He is just preparing our hearts for one another! :)

picture to frame:
my alma mater OVIEDO HIGH SCHOOL won the 6a state championship for girls soccer.  and if you know me - you know my heart belongs to that lady lion soccer program.  my sister was a 4-year varsity letterman and i was a 3-year varsity letterman in soccer.  i was proud to represent 'the jonesies' and see the program win it's first ever state title and become one of the state's most elite programs!! congrats girls and a special congratulations to COACH WAISANEN!!!

highlights of the week:
sun bathing in ft. lauderdale. cracking up at snooki on jersey shore last night. my dvr'ed collection of ELLEN. catching up on blogs!!!

weekend to do list:
birthday celebrations. catching up on blogs!!! haha. church. cleaning. organizing. and PLANNING! and if you know me, i ain't much of a planner! i'm a fly by the seat of my pants kind of girl that believes in this quote hanging on my wall:

But I do get to plan some fun stuff like...a reunion with Elena, Taylor, Jackie, Brett, Whitney, McGoo, and other BAMA friends on the beauitful Gulf coast with some pretty groooovy artists in the lineup at the Hangout Music Fest!!!

check it out: hangoutmusicfest.com

"Music doesn't lie.
If there is something to be changed in this world,
then it can only happen through music."
-Jimi Hendrix

peace and love

baily

weekly recap inspired by
letters from coco

tuesday smiles

Why this smile today?

Well, my always perfectly accessorized Momma brought me this pretty necklace home from work today.  The necklace is from The LOFT.

I love the coral & plum colors (two of my favorites that I like to rock) and the design is so rustic and hardware inspired but girly and soft with the satin-like fabrics intertwined.  I really love it!!!

Thanks, Mom!

You're the best!!!

GUESS WHAT!?!

I'm off to the wonderful city of

 SAVANNAH, GEORGIA

tomorrow for a little road-trip with Mom & Daddy...

I can't wait...

 I think a get-away is just what I need right now!

I will try to post/stay caught-up on all your lovely blogs while I'm away, but if I seem M.I.A. these next few days - that is why!

I will be away being simply Southern, charming, and graceful.

Because in a place like Savannah... how can you be anything BUT?

peace&love

baily

"Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."

-Rumi

things i need to say

"If you're lucky enough to be different

from everyone else, don't change." 

 -Taylor Swift

Since moving back home and having a clearer mind about things, I have learned so much more about myself.  I have been pedal to the metal in 'self-discovery mode' for two solid years now, but I wasn't getting anywhere - I was either running in place or driving in circles.  I wasn't telling the truth about myself and I was letting my fears control my life and my lifestyle.  I am a firm believer that it took the act of me moving home and humbling myself to the truth about me. 

The ugly truths about me. 

It sounds like it was devastating and an all-out personal tragedy, but to be honest, it was the most beautiful decision I have ever made.  Well, second most beautiful decision.  The day I handed my life over to Christ was the day I made the most beautiful.  But coming home was a 'right move' and it has lead to so many self-revelations and new learning experiences about who I am and

what I want to become.

Since coming home, I've been reassured of these simple truths about life.

There's no place like home.

I am loved.

Home is where the heart is.

There's always one place that'll call me one of their own.

Friends come and go but true friends never leave you.

Family matters most.

A Sunday sermon can change life around.

Progress happens one step at a time.

I am different.  Always have been; always will be.

The thing is, I love that I am different.  I love that on several first dates I've been told, "you're one of the most interesting girls I've ever met."  I love that people say I am one of a kind.  I am happy because I embrace it.  I am happy because I can laugh at my flaws and know that God thinks I am perfect.  I am full of joy because I am surrounded by friends who are happy that "Baily Jones" is back in town.  I keep a positive attitude about my situation because I know my family has faith in me and therefore it's easy to keep the faith in myself.  I am not sad, down, and out.  I feel no misery and I'm free of darkness and doubt.  I came home and faced the honesty that I had been running from, and my chains were lifted.

I am free.

I am me.

Free-bird.

Since coming home and experiencing this freedom that I found through the truth, I have been a different person.  I better person.  I've fallen in love with myself again.  I have confidance when I look in the mirror and I finally have the desire to show my bubbly nature and radiance now.  I think it is because I am finally in a place where people appreciate that radiance, they have a bond much stronger with the bubbly Baily than they did with the depressed & distant Baily. 

It took me coming home to where my roots are to find

some of the missing pieces of my life's puzzle. 

When I say I hit the pavement running in the direction of self-discovery, I mean I went searching high and low.  In the wrong groups of friends, in the right groups of friends.  In the wrong guys, and in more wrong guys.  In cities, social groups, and organizations.  In life passions, life dreams, and bucket lists.  I turned 21 years old and realized I hadn't really started living so I took it upon myself to find the life worth living.  It is just unfortunate for me that I chose to it at a time and place that weren't right and I was too young and stupid to realize the bigger problem. 

I was a child of the world and not a child of God

and that is never a good start for starting over. 

It's funny how God kept interrupting and tried to pull me back on His path, but I refused to until I had no choice.  I lost control and finally made a responsible decision and decided to humble myself and better myself rather than run from it or sweep it under the rug and go on lying to myself and everyone around me that I was ok and had control of everything in my life. 

Now, God has control and things are better than ever for me personally.

He brought me to a place that is nurturing me back to completeness.

He's blessed me with reunited friendships and the sense of familiarity that I was desperately longing for.  A place that accepts me for me and hated to see me so un-Baily like.  I find that such a comfort in a world where we seem to be manipulated and changed by the people around us during this self-searching phase of life.  The only changes these friends want to see in me are the self-improvement goals I've made for myself - and that is something that means a lot. 

I don't feel like I'm not worth it to anyone here.  People go out of their way to help me, to boost me up, and to hold me accountable.  I mean that they hold me accountable because I have found myself being a better friend to others, just by being around these wonderful folks.  When someone very special to me told me that I was beautiful last night, I believed him because I can trust these people.

Even after all the stabs in the back and the unfaithfulness and the verbal abuse I have suffered from guys in my past, I am able to love and have no fear because I am cared about and truly adored by them. 

It's a feeling and a peace of mind that words simply cannot explain.

Like this text message from a friend that made me happy.

The little things in life mean everything to me.

Sender:

"You are just Baily Jones...

what more is there to say. 

That is what it is."

If that doesn't make ya feel good, I don't know what does.

I'm aware that I'm a little different, my life story is full of beauty and tragedy, and I have an odd and quirky way about me... but it's who I am and I've always believed that if you don't love yourself then no one else will love you.  Well, I came home and found the parts of me that I had gone astray over the past few years, and I'm loving who I am becoming and I love, even more so, that I am admired for just being me.

So thank you to everyone who loves me for me.

Who didn't give up on me, try to change me,

or try to make me believe I am a bad person or not worth it.

The people who have stuck by me through the storm and are now standing in the sun with me. 

I love you more than I can justify with words.

"It's your gift to see the beauty and the horror in ordinary things. It doesn't make you crazy - just different. There's nothing wrong with being different."

-Cassandra Clare; City of Bones

peace and love

BE AS YOU ARE

baily

"You've got one life; live it. Follow your dreams, quit your job, drop out of school, tell your boyfriend that he is lousy, and walk out the door. This is your time. This is your life.

You know what? Dream as big as you want to,

it's the cheapest thing you'll ever do.

-Jared Leto

WILW

What I'm Lovin' Wednesday

 

I'm loving this quote because it reminds me of my life and I'm touched by it...

"Looking back on what I said all those years ago - all the hopes and dreams I had, I've come to the conclusion that if having things turn out the way you wanted them to is a measure of successful life - then some would say I'm a failure.  The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments.  Learn to let go of the past and recognize that not every day is going to be sunny. And when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair, remember it is only in the black of night that you see the stars and those stars will lead you back home. So don't be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble and fall, because most of the time the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most - so maybe you'll get everything you wished for.  Maybe you'll get more than you ever could have imagined.  Who knows where life will take you - the road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination."

-One Tree Hill

<weheartit>

I'm loving my Brother-in-Law on his 27th Birthday today!!!
He is the most wonderful husband to my Sissy.  I always say that I will
NEVER settle for a man who doesn't look at me the way that Tyler looks at her.
He loves her, she loves him, and their love story started when I was in 7th grade and my Sissy was in 9th grade, Tyler was in 10th.  That's a long time!!!
I'm so glad he is in our lives... he is the brother I never had & always wanted!

Tyler and Ashley

Ashley, Tyler, and I

I'm loving my visit back to my old "stompin' grounds" last night when I went to the Oviedo vs. Haggerty girls' soccer game last night. 
I met one of my bff's/former teammates, Beth, up there.  Her sister was the keeper for Haggerty, but she and I are Oviedo girl's soccer alums!!!
My BlackBerry camera did not bring it's "A-game" last night - sorry...

I'm loving my new bikini that I bought at Forever 21. 

I am excited about replacing all of my bikinis that I lost in the fire. 

ESPECIALLY SINCE I AM A FLORIDA GIRL AGAIN!!!

I'm also loving these jewels I got there, too!!!

Lots of turquoise, of course ;)

I gave some mid-week hugs to these babies today. 

I took Jackson, Lola, and Millie with me as I ran errands today.

I'm offically the 'crazy Boxer lady' around town, I do believe!

I'm loving that it is NATIONAL SIGNING DAY in the College Football world!

As of now, we have the #3 recruiting class... let's go BAMA!!!

Roll Tide!

I'm loving all the opportunities that have opened their doors to me, as others have shut in my face.  I'm talking about school options, work options, mean ex-boyfriends and a new dating life, new friends, the blog world: accessories swaps, guest-posts, and giveaways, and all sorts of other awesome stuff about my life!  Basically, I'm finally at a place of contentment - a peace of mind and lots of love! More things are starting to fall INTO place rather than OUT OF place!  About damn time. Ha!

weheartit

Ooo, oooh! Almost forgot...

I'm loving that I'm planning a getaway with one of my favorite girls. 

We're thinking somewhere COASTAL and CHIC.

weheartit

peace & love

bai